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That's a problem with him, though. Not you.
[Granted, he doesn't know any of the details. But Haruka must be holding onto so much guilt that didn't belong. It seems best to state it plainly.]
It sounds like he gave promises he didn't keep. The job of a father isn't to tear his children down the second they aren't what he hoped they would be and send them away.
...It's not stupid to want someone to be proud, Haruka. It isn't.
[Granted, he doesn't know any of the details. But Haruka must be holding onto so much guilt that didn't belong. It seems best to state it plainly.]
It sounds like he gave promises he didn't keep. The job of a father isn't to tear his children down the second they aren't what he hoped they would be and send them away.
...It's not stupid to want someone to be proud, Haruka. It isn't.
[Beelzebub… is far too nice for someone for Haruka, even if this is all he’s wanted from someone. He doesn’t know the things Haruka’s done because of the resentment he held for Kujou, though it, again, seems like something stupid to bring up to a demon.
He sniffles, rubbing at his eyes and shaking his head.]
It’s all in the past, now. It doesn’t matter here.
[He just wanted to make sure Beel was feeling okay, and now he’s the one crying!! How embarrassing…]
He sniffles, rubbing at his eyes and shaking his head.]
It’s all in the past, now. It doesn’t matter here.
[He just wanted to make sure Beel was feeling okay, and now he’s the one crying!! How embarrassing…]
Maybe it doesn't. It still matters to you, though.
[The tears wouldn't flow if the heart wasn't hurting.
...
He plucks out one of his snack bags of cookies, gently reaching over to deposit it against the teen's leg.]
I've been away from my Father for centuries. I still think my feelings about that matter. Even in a place like this.
[The tears wouldn't flow if the heart wasn't hurting.
...
He plucks out one of his snack bags of cookies, gently reaching over to deposit it against the teen's leg.]
I've been away from my Father for centuries. I still think my feelings about that matter. Even in a place like this.
[He looks at the cookie bag, hesitantly picking it up. He’s not particularly hungry after the debacle this day has been, but… he doesn’t want to reject the gesture, either.]
…What was he like? Your father.
…What was he like? Your father.
...
[There's a long, long exhale, the demon's eyes trailing to his lap as he thinks. How would he describe Father?]
Loving. Powerful. Omnipotent.
But he had his rules.
[There's a long, long exhale, the demon's eyes trailing to his lap as he thinks. How would he describe Father?]
Loving. Powerful. Omnipotent.
But he had his rules.
[Ah.]
Did you break them?
[Why else would he not have seen him in centuries?]
Did you break them?
[Why else would he not have seen him in centuries?]
[...]
Not at first.
...My little sister did, though.
Not at first.
...My little sister did, though.
…This is the first time you’ve mentioned a sister.
[What did she do?]
What was she like?
[What did she do?]
What was she like?
[...
His eyes pain as he looks back down at his lap.]
Lilith was bright. Energetic. Curious. Really, really stubborn. She liked to challenge people whether she won or lost. And she loved humanity.
She had a lot of love, even for an angel. It was like being around the sun.
His eyes pain as he looks back down at his lap.]
Lilith was bright. Energetic. Curious. Really, really stubborn. She liked to challenge people whether she won or lost. And she loved humanity.
She had a lot of love, even for an angel. It was like being around the sun.
[Wait, wait, hold on a second. Angel?
A loving, omnipotent father with strict rules…
Ah.
It makes sense, with what little he knows of the Bible and Lucifer, but it’s still a surprise to hear. He hadn’t considered it at all.]
…You’re a fallen angel?
A loving, omnipotent father with strict rules…
Ah.
It makes sense, with what little he knows of the Bible and Lucifer, but it’s still a surprise to hear. He hadn’t considered it at all.]
…You’re a fallen angel?
[He nods briefly.]
Yeah. It's been a long time, but... all but one of my brothers and I used to be angels. Lilith was, too.
Yeah. It's been a long time, but... all but one of my brothers and I used to be angels. Lilith was, too.
Edited 2023-06-02 20:15 (UTC)
[Whenever Haruka peaced out to go back to Kingfisher, Beelzebub had still been very much asleep and still all horns and wings.
But once he slips back in, someone is upright in bed, crosslegged, surrounded on all sides by snack bags and fruit and cookies and gum wrappers, a banana halfway in his mouth as he scrolls through his U-PINION. His eyes flick up slightly when he sees someone entering the room, but it lights up when it isn't one of his normal roommates.]
H'rukrr?
[Banana mouth.]
But once he slips back in, someone is upright in bed, crosslegged, surrounded on all sides by snack bags and fruit and cookies and gum wrappers, a banana halfway in his mouth as he scrolls through his U-PINION. His eyes flick up slightly when he sees someone entering the room, but it lights up when it isn't one of his normal roommates.]
H'rukrr?
[Banana mouth.]
Edited 2023-06-05 12:49 (UTC)
[What does he even do with this information… It’s not like it really changes anything about who Beel is, but him being a demon has already factored into their friendship so little…
At least on Haruka’s end.]
Where is Lilith now?
At least on Haruka’s end.]
Where is Lilith now?
...
She fell in love with a human.
We let it happen for a while. Angels aren't supposed to get involved with humanity like that unless you choose to be someone's guardian. But she was so happy... so we didn't intervene.
[There's such complicated guilt that still rises from that, even now. Would it have been better, if anyone had stopped her? Knowing what was to come?]
Eventually the human got sick and was going to die. Lilith snuck food out from the Celestial Realm to extend the human's life, which was forbidden. And when Father found out, He was going to get rid of her. Erase her for her disobedience.
We had a lot of different issues with Father, even before then. But when Father said what He was going to do to our sister, that was the last straw for a lot of us.
When the Celestial War broke out after Lucifer rebelled against our Father, we all took Lucifer's side, including Lilith. But... she was shot from the heavens during the fighting, and fell to her death.
She fell in love with a human.
We let it happen for a while. Angels aren't supposed to get involved with humanity like that unless you choose to be someone's guardian. But she was so happy... so we didn't intervene.
[There's such complicated guilt that still rises from that, even now. Would it have been better, if anyone had stopped her? Knowing what was to come?]
Eventually the human got sick and was going to die. Lilith snuck food out from the Celestial Realm to extend the human's life, which was forbidden. And when Father found out, He was going to get rid of her. Erase her for her disobedience.
We had a lot of different issues with Father, even before then. But when Father said what He was going to do to our sister, that was the last straw for a lot of us.
When the Celestial War broke out after Lucifer rebelled against our Father, we all took Lucifer's side, including Lilith. But... she was shot from the heavens during the fighting, and fell to her death.
[Haruka freezes in the doorway, surprised to see Beel upright, but it doesn’t take long for relief to set in.
He closes the door behind himself, looking at Beel nervously.]
How are you feeling?
[He’s eating, so that’s a good sign.]
He closes the door behind himself, looking at Beel nervously.]
How are you feeling?
[He’s eating, so that’s a good sign.]
[Haruka is quiet for a long moment, taking it all in, before he shifts to face Beel more directly. There’s so much he wants to ask, but it all feels so irrelevant and would only serve to sate his curiosity.
It won’t change that it all feels so… pointless and cruel. Why should Lilith have been punished for falling in love, even if it was with a human? If He didn’t want that, why make angels that could feel love in the first place?]
I’m sorry, Beel.
[…]
I hope she was at least happy, before everything went wrong.
[Even if it was a fleeting thing.]
It won’t change that it all feels so… pointless and cruel. Why should Lilith have been punished for falling in love, even if it was with a human? If He didn’t want that, why make angels that could feel love in the first place?]
I’m sorry, Beel.
[…]
I hope she was at least happy, before everything went wrong.
[Even if it was a fleeting thing.]
...I hope so, too.
I still feel guilty. That maybe if we'd said something sooner, Father wouldn't have had to intervene. We could have avoided war. Lilith could still be alive. If I'd been faster when the arrow was shot, maybe I could have saved her.
...
But... it's wishful thinking. I can't change our issues with Father, or how he thinks of us. I can't change how he thought of Lilith. And I can't bring her back.
[It still hurts to even acknowledge, to think of her face, to think of Belphie, to think of the sorrow that still hung heavy about her after millenia. But...
He lets out a breath.]
All I can do is... be me. Protect what I know I care about now.
I still feel guilty. That maybe if we'd said something sooner, Father wouldn't have had to intervene. We could have avoided war. Lilith could still be alive. If I'd been faster when the arrow was shot, maybe I could have saved her.
...
But... it's wishful thinking. I can't change our issues with Father, or how he thinks of us. I can't change how he thought of Lilith. And I can't bring her back.
[It still hurts to even acknowledge, to think of her face, to think of Belphie, to think of the sorrow that still hung heavy about her after millenia. But...
He lets out a breath.]
All I can do is... be me. Protect what I know I care about now.
[Sorry, Haru, Beel is standing up IMMEDIATELY in a cacophony of snack wrappers to practically dash across the room and throw his arms around the teen.
How loud is he screaming]
How loud is he screaming]
[It’s less a scream and more a startled yelp, on the scale of Haruka’s screeching.]
H-hey!
[please be careful with his poor human bones]
H-hey!
[please be careful with his poor human bones]
[time to snap crackle pop
no but Beelzebub is squeezing him pretty tightly, an exhale of relief.]
You're okay.
I'm so glad, Haru.
no but Beelzebub is squeezing him pretty tightly, an exhale of relief.]
You're okay.
I'm so glad, Haru.
[help he needs to breathe
but also-]
Why are you worried about if I'm okay?
[He might sound a little panicked.]
You... I thought you were dead!
but also-]
Why are you worried about if I'm okay?
[He might sound a little panicked.]
You... I thought you were dead!
[How many times now has someone said the same thing? There's a visible hesitation, confused, frustrated, as though he wants to ask something. But he bites it back, letting his grip go to instead hold Haru by the shoulders.]
And I thought you were dead, too. The last I remember, you'd vanished, and so had Xiao, and so did the card he sent you both through...
I... don't remember what happened. But I'm okay, Haru. I am.
And I'm so sorry.
And I thought you were dead, too. The last I remember, you'd vanished, and so had Xiao, and so did the card he sent you both through...
I... don't remember what happened. But I'm okay, Haru. I am.
And I'm so sorry.
[Haruka goes quiet for a moment, looking away from Beel. His brows knit, and after a moment he sighs.]
You killed Lobelia - or, or something like that.
[He didn’t exactly have a great view of things, and he doesn’t exactly want to remember it all.]
…But as long as you’re okay right now, you have nothing to be sorry for.
You killed Lobelia - or, or something like that.
[He didn’t exactly have a great view of things, and he doesn’t exactly want to remember it all.]
…But as long as you’re okay right now, you have nothing to be sorry for.
[...
For a brief moment, he looks deeply ashamed.
But he'll still nod, letting his hands drop away from the teen's arms to instead clasp in front of him, wringing at one of his wrists.]
...Mn.
I'm glad he won't be around to torture you anymore. The bastard.
For a brief moment, he looks deeply ashamed.
But he'll still nod, letting his hands drop away from the teen's arms to instead clasp in front of him, wringing at one of his wrists.]
...Mn.
I'm glad he won't be around to torture you anymore. The bastard.
It’s…
[He sighs, wrapping his arms over his chest.]
It wasn’t torture. He wasn’t… any worse then people I’ve known before.
[Except he kind of was, because at least Ryou never managed to actually kill anyone. Still, something about writing Lobelia off as someone entirely cruel doesn’t sit right with Haruka…
Maybe he’s just stupid.]
[He sighs, wrapping his arms over his chest.]
It wasn’t torture. He wasn’t… any worse then people I’ve known before.
[Except he kind of was, because at least Ryou never managed to actually kill anyone. Still, something about writing Lobelia off as someone entirely cruel doesn’t sit right with Haruka…
Maybe he’s just stupid.]
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