[He immediately swallows, inhaling a bunch of air in the process. A sharp pain follows as it goes down, making him wince and grip at his chest for a second.]
I...guess it depends. But no matter what, it's gonna start with him being pissed. I don't think there's any getting around that.
[He doesn't want to talk about this he doesn't want to talk about this he doesn't--
...
He swallows.]
I'm. Um. I'm failing a couple of my classes.
...Coach told me at the start of the season that if I don't get my grades better, I won't be able to play past midterms. So I've been seeing a tutor for one of them. But I'm... not getting any better.
...
I don't really know how to tell Lucas. Or... if I should yet.
He remembers when Barrett alluded to this last month. He was really, really hoping that things had changed, but apparently they haven't. All the drama with Fragment surely hasn't helped either. Even Levi's found it hard to concentrate on school, and he's been trying to get better about it too.
...
He sets down the controller so he can give Barrett his full attention.]
Which classes? And when are midterms again? [Yes he knows he should know this...] Maybe you don't need to tell him. Maybe I can help. Me and Kara have been doing study sessions, so...
[He might not be in Barrett's position, but he understands the fear of something hindering his athletic career. He knows how important football is to Barrett. He knows the fear of letting others down.
It's not something he wants Barrett to suffer through.]
Um. Algebra. Biology. I have to get a good grade on my Western Civ midterm, too...
I have a math tutor already who's been trying their best, and it's helping a little. But... I don't know if it'll be enough for my coach. Or for Lucas.
[He wants to have hope, that he can make it work. But a warning hanging over his head every week just makes it seem that much more intimidating, especially when he can't seem to get his footing.]
I have my first one... two weeks from Wednesday, I think. Fall break is right after that, second week of October.
[Levi nods along, crossing his arms thoughtfully. He's not a straight-A student like Lucas and Damian, but he's decent enough. He should be able to help with those subjects.]
Hmmm... Then it's not too late to try to turn this around. That's good, at least. I'm glad you said something.
[He means it. He really wants to make this work.]
What grade are they even looking for? Something that keeps you at a certain GPA?
[It's not the response he was expecting from Levi of all people... but it still makes the cold grip of shame lessen a bit, to have one of his brothers believe in him without doubt.]
2.0 minimum. I lose my whole scholarship if I don't have at least that by finals, but they'll pull me from the bench if it's not better for midterms.
I have, uh... 1.7 right now? I think. If I could get everything to a C, I'd be okay. Civ and Algebra I need a B.
I mean... If you're okay with me helping, it should be doable.
[He keeps his eyes on Barrett, his expression serious but caring. His candidness surprises even himself. He used to be so envious of Barrett's success. But as time has passed, he's finally begun to see what's actually important.]
I know how much football means to you, so I don't want you to lose out on it because of bad grades. Plus, um...I really wanna keep watching you play.
[Levi can't help but smile about Barrett being on board with the idea. Hopefully this takes some of the weight off of his shoulders.
As for his own worries...he lets out a little laugh.]
Sorry, no can do. My big brother instincts decided to kick in for once, so I'm gonna listen to them.
[They've been doing that a lot more lately, he's noticed. He cares about his brothers a lot and loves them dearly, that's never been a question. But he's also felt something of a disconnect from them for a long time. A...self-imposed disconnect, if he were to examine it closely and admit to it.
Spending all of this time with Barrett in Fragment and enduring hardship after hardship together brought on by the game's frightening instability has resulted in him thinking about that disconnect, and whether or not he wants to spend the rest of his life simply letting it remain there.
He knows the answer to that now.]
Watching you succeed is something that makes me happy, you know. I'm...really proud of how far you've come.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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I...guess it depends. But no matter what, it's gonna start with him being pissed. I don't think there's any getting around that.
[The follow-up is probably obvious.]
...Why?
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...
He swallows.]
I'm. Um. I'm failing a couple of my classes.
...Coach told me at the start of the season that if I don't get my grades better, I won't be able to play past midterms. So I've been seeing a tutor for one of them. But I'm... not getting any better.
...
I don't really know how to tell Lucas. Or... if I should yet.
no subject
[He murmurs, eyes wide.
He remembers when Barrett alluded to this last month. He was really, really hoping that things had changed, but apparently they haven't. All the drama with Fragment surely hasn't helped either. Even Levi's found it hard to concentrate on school, and he's been trying to get better about it too.
...
He sets down the controller so he can give Barrett his full attention.]
Which classes? And when are midterms again? [Yes he knows he should know this...] Maybe you don't need to tell him. Maybe I can help. Me and Kara have been doing study sessions, so...
[He might not be in Barrett's position, but he understands the fear of something hindering his athletic career. He knows how important football is to Barrett. He knows the fear of letting others down.
It's not something he wants Barrett to suffer through.]
no subject
I have a math tutor already who's been trying their best, and it's helping a little. But... I don't know if it'll be enough for my coach. Or for Lucas.
[He wants to have hope, that he can make it work. But a warning hanging over his head every week just makes it seem that much more intimidating, especially when he can't seem to get his footing.]
I have my first one... two weeks from Wednesday, I think. Fall break is right after that, second week of October.
no subject
Hmmm... Then it's not too late to try to turn this around. That's good, at least. I'm glad you said something.
[He means it. He really wants to make this work.]
What grade are they even looking for? Something that keeps you at a certain GPA?
no subject
[It's not the response he was expecting from Levi of all people... but it still makes the cold grip of shame lessen a bit, to have one of his brothers believe in him without doubt.]
2.0 minimum. I lose my whole scholarship if I don't have at least that by finals, but they'll pull me from the bench if it's not better for midterms.
I have, uh... 1.7 right now? I think. If I could get everything to a C, I'd be okay. Civ and Algebra I need a B.
no subject
[He keeps his eyes on Barrett, his expression serious but caring. His candidness surprises even himself. He used to be so envious of Barrett's success. But as time has passed, he's finally begun to see what's actually important.]
I know how much football means to you, so I don't want you to lose out on it because of bad grades. Plus, um...I really wanna keep watching you play.
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Yeah. If you think I can, then... maybe I really can.
[Maybe. Maybe he can right this. Maybe he doesn't have to worry about letting them all down. Maybe it can be a team effort, just like football...]
I'll have to work hard. I want to keep playing for you guys.
Don't worry about me too much. I like seeing you happy. And I want to see you do things you like, too.
no subject
[Levi can't help but smile about Barrett being on board with the idea. Hopefully this takes some of the weight off of his shoulders.
As for his own worries...he lets out a little laugh.]
Sorry, no can do. My big brother instincts decided to kick in for once, so I'm gonna listen to them.
[They've been doing that a lot more lately, he's noticed. He cares about his brothers a lot and loves them dearly, that's never been a question. But he's also felt something of a disconnect from them for a long time. A...self-imposed disconnect, if he were to examine it closely and admit to it.
Spending all of this time with Barrett in Fragment and enduring hardship after hardship together brought on by the game's frightening instability has resulted in him thinking about that disconnect, and whether or not he wants to spend the rest of his life simply letting it remain there.
He knows the answer to that now.]
Watching you succeed is something that makes me happy, you know. I'm...really proud of how far you've come.